THIS PAGE IS NSFW. The content discussed is much more distressing than other portions of this site, so take care when proceeding.

This page will be a little bit different than the others, because this piece of media is genuinely shocking and upsetting as opposed to something playfully creepy and fun. But it's something that I think about and revisit every couple years or so, so I wanted to talk about it and my feelings about it. I'll put a link at the end for anybody who still wants to read it.

This post will talk about Blowfly Girl's blog, where she has posted several graphic, NSFW stories depicting her unsanitary sexual practices. She also has several posts talking about her job, her depression, and more mundane things. The stories involve maggots, garbage, feces, and dead animals, and also talk about genital injuries. It is presented as fact and told through blog posts, though it has not necesarily been confirmed to be true. She writes with a lot of detail, and even her mundane posts have a very upsetting and sad tone to them, so if you want to read them, make sure you're in the right headspace to do so. The only images on the site are her icon, which is a fruit fly, and her banner, which is a low-resolution photo of a bunch of maggots.


I think I probably read Blowfly Girl for the first time in the first half of high school, so I don't think I've known about her for more than 8 years, max. But in the time since then, I've thought about her and her posts occassionally, and I always end up going back when these thoughts arise to peruse her stories again. It's not because I enjoy them, or because I like reading them. I would recommend most people don't read her blog, anyway, just because there's no real reason or reward besides saying, "I read this infamous thing online in its entirety." Her blog makes me very sad, but it's kind of fascinating, too.

I hope when I say that, it doesn't sound creepy or disrespectful. There's no proof to any of these stories, but when I read her blog, I can just feel that it's true. The sentiment expressed in her posts feels so real to me that I can't imagine somebody writing this as a joke or for attention, not to mention the fact that she originally posted her story way back on GeoCities before reposting it on her blog in 2009.

This is all a longwinded way of saying that I believe she's a real, flesh and blood woman, and that I don't want to treat her or her blog as a shock site to be passed around willy-nilly and gawked at. I approach this as the diary of somebody who has been through a lot of things in her life, and engaged in self-destructive sexual behavior as a result of it, which is a sentiment that I can empathize with despite the extreme degree to which her actions took place.

I don't really know how to describe the feeling I get from her blog. There's disgust at the actions, sure, but the main sentiment is always... just an extreme wish for her well-being, a desire for her to be living a life in which she's treated well and content. That probably sounds dumb. She's a forty year old woman, now - twice my age - and she's doing her own thing, hundreds of miles away from me, a random person she's never met and never will. But that's always how I feel. It's not pity or sympathy. But I guess I wouldn't say I'm sending her love or anything like that. Maybe just compassion. I don't know what to call it, exactly.

I've thought about sending her an email before - her last update was in 2017, but her email is still right up on her banner. I don't know if she'd ever check it. I don't know what I would even say?

"Hi, I read your story online when I was a teenager. I hope you're doing well. I think about your blog sometimes, and I hope things in your life are warm and kind to you. That's it, I guess."

I mean, I don't know. If I was her, and I got an email like this, it would probably be weird. I doubt I'll ever send her anything, but whenever I think about her again every year or so, I just always take a minute and conjure up some kind energy for her. I don't really pray or anything but I hope she can feel that energy, maybe.

She isn't, like, an idol or a celebrity or anything to me. She's just a normal person out there, who's done some things, and sometimes I think about those things, and they make me think about my own self a little bit. Everybody has little pieces of media or quotes or stories that influence them and this is one of mine. If you still want to read her blog, the particularly famous post that went around the internet is here. I'll mention just once more that this feels a lot different than full-on shock sites or scary, fun stories, so only read it if you're okay with that.

That's all, I guess; I just thought about her again tonight, and decided I wanted to write about her a little bit. I don't know if she can feel the attention or if she knows people (me) are still talking about her. I don't know if she'd even still want people to talk about her for this particular thing. That's probably not something I'll ever know. I can at least take solace in the fact that I don't distill her existence to the stories she's put online. Once again I hope that life is treating her well, and that she's content. If she ever updates again it would make me very happy to know she's doing well.