Content warnings: This 
		game is 18+ and intended for adults only. This game contains explicit 
		depictions of sexual content, dubcon, violence, arm/hand mutilation, 
		psychological torture, scatological imagery, internalized homophobia, 
		and mentions of child abuse.
		
		There is non-explicit (but prevalent) discussion of sexual content on 
		this page. I do talk about major themes in the game, but don't give any 
		specific spoilers regarding plot points or endings.

---
		As always, I have returned with a post about a horrific and upsetting 
		visual novel that I discovered entirely on accident. This time, the 
		subject in question is Room No. 9, a psychological horror BL 
		game by the company Parade. I had never heard of Parade or any of their 
		three games, of which Room No. 9 was the second released, and stumbled 
		upon it accidentally when I saw it mentioned as a game 'similar to' 
		sweet pool. Of course, I was immediately sucked in by this comparison, 
		and after reading a review of it, it absolutely haunted me. For a solid 
		two to three days it was the only thing that I could think about, and I 
		finally caved and decided to play it. Do I regret that decision? I 
		might, actually.
		
		
(pictured above: the hubris of man who has not yet seen the horrors)
		
		Room No. 9 centers around the protagonist, Daichi Kobayashi, and his 
		best friend, Seiji Azumi. The two are college students who have been 
		friends since middle school, and the game begins when they meet up to go 
		drinking to celebrate the end of Seiji's exams. Daichi laments a recent 
		breakup with his newest girlfriend, and the two decide to take advantage 
		of a resort reservation that Daichi had already made in advance. Thus, 
		they head to Okinawa, ready to enjoy ten full days of fun and 
		relaxation.
		
		However, upon reaching Okinawa, their vacation plan screeches to a halt 
		when they wake up in a hotel room with no recollection of how they 
		arrived. There's a digital screen in place of their window, the exit 
		door is tightly locked, and they are welcomed only by a cold and 
		clinical television screen that details their participation in a 
		'behavioral study'.
		
		Every day, for ten days, they will be given a choice between two tasks. 
		If they complete a task successfully, they will be awarded ten points 
		and their meals for the next day, and when they reach a total of 100 
		points, they are free to leave. Refusal to complete an assigned task by 
		the end of the day means they will receive neither points nor food, and 
		if their behavior is deemed too uncooperative or unruly, there will be 
		swift punishment.
		
		It quickly becomes apparent after the first few days that there is a 
		pattern to these tasks: either Daichi must sexually debase Seiji, or 
		Seiji must physically mutilate Daichi. The choice of which task to 
		execute is left entirely up to the two men themselves, though from a 
		gameplay standpoint, a large majority of the tasks are decided without 
		player input. With each completed task, the severity of their next 
		assignment is increased. The game follows the two best friends over the 
		course of ten days as the moral quandries of their situation slowly 
		overtake them.
		
		---
		
		Room No. 9 was an absolutely fascinating and deeply haunting story that 
		affected me much, much more strongly than I ever could have anticipated. 
		As somebody who finds the overlap and contrast between sex and violence 
		one of the most interesting topics imaginable, I thought that this game 
		would be a twistedly enjoyable trek through performative gore that I would 
		play once, get freaked out by at the appropriate moments, and probably 
		never play again. I could not have been more wrong.
		
		I am a very sensitive person when it comes to media, in the fact that I 
		react very strongly to it, but I genuinely played a solid 60% of this 
		game with tears in my eyes. I got viscerally sick to my stomach multiple 
		times and even contemplated not finishing it because it made me so 
		upset. This wasn't due to the severity of the content itself - although 
		the violent tasks did make me very uncomfortable with how realistic they 
		felt - but because of the tone of the game itself and the way the tasks 
		weighed so heavily on the characters. In fact, I was relieved 
		whenever Daichi would be hurt, because he bounced back much quicker from 
		pain than Seiji could from the sexual tasks. 
		
		Forced sexual content is usually something that I can handle fairly well 
		in media, though more realistic depictions and certain aspects of it 
		make it very hard for me to move past, but the way it was portrayed in 
		this game made me physically ill. All of the tasks are, technically, 
		consensual - Seiji and Daichi have lengthy conversations about what 
		they're going to do, and they affirm multiple times that they are okay 
		with it. But of course, they're not - how could they be okay 
		with any part of this situation?
		
		What makes it even more uncomfortable is that Daichi genuinely can 
		handle being tortured physically, but we watch as Seiji, after each of 
		his tasks, crumbles under the disgust of what is being done to him. 
		However, Daichi and Seiji care about each other so much that instead of 
		turning on each other under the pressure of their situation, they 
		instead fight to be the victim. Daichi insists that he's used to being 
		hurt because of how he was physically abused as a child, while Seiji 
		argues that being sexually abused won't leave lasting scars on his body 
		and that he can just ignore it if he tries hard enough. Each one of them 
		makes a compelling, desperate argument that leaves the player at a loss 
		for what the 'right' answer is - if there even is a right 
		answer in a situation like this.
		
		Regardless of who is being explicitly harmed on any given day, both 
		Daichi and Seiji are suffering. For both of them, being the agressor is 
		much more painful than being the victim. Both characters wrestle 
		endlessly with this impossible dilemma - it would be so much easier 
		if he hurt me, because I don't want to hurt him. But making him hurt me 
		is already hurting him in a different way. The fact that the two of 
		them prioritize each other makes every interaction feel hopeless, 
		because instead of selfishly protecting themselves, both of them lose no 
		matter what they choose to do. To further complicate matters, as the 
		days go on, Daichi begins to realize that he may have some unresolved 
		romantic and sexual feelings for Seiji. 
		
		Or does he? Has he always felt this way, or is his mind just 
		trying to excuse the actions he's being forced to perform on his best 
		friend? Is he enjoying this? Is he reacting to these events because he's 
		attracted to Seiji, or because the idea of hurting somebody is exciting 
		to him? If they weren't forced to do these things, would he still want 
		to? For Daichi, whose friendship with Seiji is literally the most 
		important thing in his life, these confusing and alarming feelings tear 
		him apart as he struggles to repress anything that might get in the way 
		of their friendship. All he wants most in the world is for him and Seiji 
		to stay best friends, no matter what, and the idea of anything changing 
		their relationship is horrifying to him. Can they remain 
		friends? And can they even remain the same people they were before they 
		stepped foot in this room?
		
		There are six endings in the game, and a wealth of settings in the menu 
		as well. There is a toggle for whether or not to show grotesque imagery, 
		and a seperate toggle for... scatological imagery, which, yes, does show 
		up near the end of the game. The tasks are all announced ahead of time 
		so you can determine what the characters are about to do and prepare 
		yourself for it. There is no toggle for sexual imagery in the uncensored 
		version, thus all of the CGs are explicit and non-mosaic. In the 
		advanced playstyle settings, you can turn on 'Easy Mode', which tells 
		you which endings each choice leads to.
		
		Playing this game absolutely put me through the wringer. I can't 
		remember the last time that something hit me so viscerally and 
		painfully, and I'm not even sure if I could articulate the exact reasons 
		that it hurt me so much without digging into some very personal issues. 
		I also don't think I would recommend it to anyone - not because it's 
		lacking in quality, but because it affected me so much that I wouldn't 
		want the same thing to happen to anyone else. I have still yet to parse 
		through all of my feelings regarding this game. I can't even say for 
		certain that I'm glad that I played it - but it is definitely 
		fascinating, I can say that for sure. I have to take my hat off to the 
		team behind it for making one of the most haunting pieces of media I've 
		experienced in quite a while.